Since becoming a mom to her only child Deia, Iza Calzado admitted that she has no regrets about not being as active in showbiz as before. But the 43-year-old actress shared that now that she is slowly accepting new projects, there is a different kind of challenge whenever she leaves for work.
“Siyempre kasi ang sarap ni Deia ka-bonding. Privilege para sa akin na mostly ako pa rin ‘yung nakakapag-patulog sa kanya sa gabi. ‘Yung I can get a lot of time with her. It’s been three and a half years. Siyempre unti-unti na akong bumabalik din sa trabaho. Bumalik naman ako sa trabaho nun pero iba kasi ‘yung phase ngayon eh. Mas may muwang na siya, mas alam niya na. Ayaw niya talagang humiwalay sa akin. I feel so needed! (laughs) Now, nandun na kami sa part ng kanyang development where she always wants to be with me. But again, iba ‘yung reality eh, ‘di ba? ‘Pag may taping, mas madami kang time away,” Iza shared during The Brilliant Hour Digibook launch event held last July 4 in Paranaque City.
READ: EXCLUSIVE: Iza Calzado on how motherhood has changed her: ‘I’m not the same person’
Currently starring in the upcoming Cinemalaya film entry Hand of God, Iza talked about how she copes with feeling guilty whenever she has to be away from her daughter.
“I’m part of a Cinemalaya film called Hand of God. Pumunta kami ng Basilan, mabilis lang, four days. Parang na-gi-guilty ka, ‘Tama ba na umalis ako?’ Pero you have to find also the times where you have to give yourself a pat on the back where you can celebrate. Gaya ng umalis ako minsan tapos iniisip ko if I will extend this trip. But I said, you know what, it’s the first time I’m going out of the country and I told Deia I’d be home on a Saturday. So ang unang tanong ko sa kanya, ‘Kailan babalik si mama?’ Sabi niya, ‘Saturday!’ Ah sabi ko hindi ako mag-e-extend. And parang may event sa LA na pinapapunta nila ako. Sabi ko, I’m so sorry. Parang ang mahalaga sa akin ngayon is to keep my word sa anak ko. I may not always succeed in doing that because life happens, but I know that in that very moment I was able to make that choice. At least hindi niya iisipin na moving forward, kung hindi man ako makauwi ay hindi ‘yun ‘yung naumpisahang sistema,” she explained.
READ: Iza Calzado reveals why she turns down teleserye projects
Iza revealed she always goes through experiencing mom guilt especially when she knows her daughter is waiting for her to come home.
“Parang ‘pag hindi ko siya napatulog, masama ang loob ko. ‘Pag napuyat din siya, may guilt din ako kung mali ba ito? ‘ wala ako sa bahay, ‘pag chinoose ko na mag-stay longer dito, na-gi-guilty ako. Madalas eh. Halimbawa, may mga co-parents kayo, kumbaga may mga tropa na kayo, may community kayo, and then magkakasama sila let’s say sa football field. And every child had a parent. Nangyari ‘yan nung isang beses, mang-ilan beses, si Deia lang ‘yung walang parent na kasama kasi pareho kaming busy ni Ben. Buti na lang nandun ‘yung mga in-laws namin, sila Bianca (King, her sister-in-law), and or si Ralph, there was always one with ‘yung pinsan ni Deia. And then other mom friends and dad friends and their children,” she said.
Even if she cannot be there for her daughter’s events, Iza proudly shared that she really makes an effort to be part of it as much as she can so Deia will know she is always trying her best to be present.
“Kaya sinikap ko talaga kahit na alam ko ang dami ko pang kailangan gawin nun. Parang break muna (sa work), bye kayo diyan kasi hahabol ako. Kahit 30 minutes to show up (for my daughter). Parang gagawan ko talaga ng paraan. Gusto ko maramdaman niya na nandun kami, hindi man lagi. Kasi may guilt na baka isipin ng anak ko bakit hindi kami binibigyan ng ganitong oras ng magulang namin?” she added.