The December 2 episode of “Kuan on One” Season 4 brought viewers another round of laughter with Matteo Guidicelli and host Melai Cantiveros-Francisco in the “Dakong Problema” segment. This time, the “problem” they had to solve was Matteo being too good at speaking Italian---leading to a hilarious Italian-Bisaya 101 showdown.
The mechanics of the game were simple, each one had to say a word or phrase in their assigned dialect, Italian for Matteo and Bisaya for Melai, and the other had to guess its meaning and write it down on a whiteboard.
Matteo kicked things off with, “Ciao, Melai. Sei molto bella.” Melai, ever the comedian, misheard “molto” as “multo.” She playfully had a hard time guessing but eventually quipped “Hello Melai, mukha kang multo na gwapa” with her answer. Matteo revealed the answer and clarified it sweetly, “Hi Melai, you’re really beautiful.”
Cue Melai’s playful tears as she felt flattered by the compliment, to which Matteo recalled how his wife, Sarah Geronimo, once praised Melai while watching her vlog in Korea, “Sabi ni Sarah, ‘pwedeng rumampa ng high fashion si Melai!’” Melai, of course, was kilig, even professing her love to the Popstar Royalty.
When it was Melai’s turn, she threw in a deep Bisaya phrase for Matteo to guess, “Nahinuklob ko sa akong mga sa.” Matteo gamely translated it as “I regret my wrongdoings” and guessed it right, earning a point against Melai, to which she joked that she regretted asking him that easy phrase.
As Matteo threw in his next Italian words, he dragged in Jason Francisco, Melai's husband, and said, “Jason, ha un bellissimo corpo.” Melai hilariously guessed, “Jason nakapangasawa ng karpa (fish).” But Matteo clarified, “Jason has a beautiful body.” The playful banter continued when Matteo asked Melai if it was true, to which she agreed in a flirty way, earning laughs from everyone in the studio.
Melai then countered with another Bisaya phrase, “Imong gihulbot ang dugay nang naungot sa akong dughan.” Matteo correctly answered, “You remove the overdue pain from my heart.” Melai was impressed with Matteo, even joking that he translated it better than her, as she answered, “Hinila mo ang matagal nang stagnant sa heart.”
Matteo then invited Melai and Jason in Italian, “Melai e Jason mandiamo al mio ristorante.” This energized Melai as she immediately knew the answer and proudly added her own twist, making Matteo add a few words, “And, la famiglia e tutto gratis.” Melai then added to her answer, “Salamat,” earning laughs once more. Melai was touched when Matteo translated his phrase to, “Melai and Jason, come eat in my restaurant in Alabang for the family, all free.”
Melai closed the game with a playful line for Matteo to translate, “Daghan tibogol sa imong kigol.” Matteo laughed, answering correctly, “A lot of dirt in your singit.” The crowd burst into laughter, ending the segment on a hilariously unfiltered note.
Enjoy new episodes of “Kuan on One” every Tuesday on the ABS-CBN Entertainment YouTube channel and on iWant.